Tuesday, February 28, 2023

Truth

I fear nothing but the truth,
because of all the monsters

who still hide under the bed, 

arousing my demurs.


They whisper their threats,

if I don’t remain silent

about all of the times,

the monsters were violent.


But they don’t use words,

so that I can’t say they did.

But they’d use those words,

if I spoke out, god forbid.


My heart aches with regret sometimes,

for choosing to live out my passion,

when I can’t truly live in the moment,

fearing the possible backlash in


the realm of the monsters,

where pure evil will hide

the fact that the truth in me

has already died.

Monday, February 27, 2023

You Hurt Me

You don’t know how to help me, so you don’t try.

I tell you how to help me, so you don’t help me.

I tell you how upset I am, so you upset me more.

I tell you that I slur my words, so you punish me.

I tell you I need you to listen, so you don’t listen.

I tell you how lonely I am, so you leave me alone.

I tell you that I’m scared, so you make me afraid.

I tell you that I’m broken, so you break me more.

You only know how to hurt me, so you hurt me more.

Sunday, February 26, 2023

Remembering Rudy

Bonk! The mouse smashes the massive hammer on the cat’s head, his face flattened into the ground. Skeeeeeeeeeer Pop! He peels his head off the ground and it pops back into shape. 


    I chuckle. I’ve watched cartoons for as long as I can remember. When I was a boy, they were black and white on big box screens. Dad got our first TV on sale and I remember him making my brother and I carry that damned thing into the living room. 


There was nothing better than racing home as soon as school let out to watch the newest cartoon come out, right at 4pm every night. The next day in school we’d be acting out all the crazy stunts till our teacher whacked our wrists with a ruler. 


Boy oh boy were those the good o’ days. Since then, my dreams have only consisted of imaginative cartoons. After all, dreams are the rule breakers of reality and logic, at least Ma would say so.


“Here” A voice pulls me out of my memories. I look at her. Have I met this woman before? She’s holding out a medicine cup with pills and a glass. “Take your meds.”


“Hmph” I said, “Why?”


She sighed. “You’re sick.”


“Hmph” I repeat, taking both cups. I pop the pills in my mouth and drink up. I study the glass for a minute before handing it back to her. I recall the gold rim and intricate designs. 


“I bought these cups.”


“I know”, she said. “You bought them for mom.”


“Hmph, right!” I exclaim, scratching my head. What was her name again? Abby? Jessica? Weird.


“Dad” She calls. 


“Huh? Dad?” I mumble, most of my attention returning to the television.


I turn back to her as she sits down beside me and doesn’t say anything. Tears slip from her eyes. This woman is sad, is she sad about her dad?


“Is everything okay?” I asked her. “Is something wrong with your dad?”


“Yeah” she breathes.


“Oh, I’m sorry.” I reply. “It’ll be okay.” She just needs encouragement. She takes my old, wrinkly hand and puts it to her soft, young lips. 


“Dad, don’t you remember me?” She whispers.


I squint at her. Yeah! There is something familiar. She looks like my wife, but has my hair. Well, the hair I once had. Then the gears clicked. 


“You are Rudy. We named you after your mothers father. You’re my daughter, right? And all grown up too! I bet your mom is proud of you!” 


Rudy laughs as more tears come out. 

“Yeah” she says. “She was.”


Rudy gives me a quick hug and then nestles her head into my shoulder. My eyes shift back to the television.


Pop! The cat now fires a gun and all that happens is a flag that comes out of the barrel and says “Bang!” I chuckle as the mouse scurries away. I loved watching cartoons as a kid. 


Boy oh boy were those the good ol’ days.

Friday, February 24, 2023

Mind over Matter

A boy sleeps upon a bed of nails

That gently caresses his skin.

No punctures and not a scratch 

But he dreams of chagrin.


There was a man at the market 

Who gave this bed for free.

He said it would only work

With faith as the key.


But like Peter walking on water,

He wakes and begins to fear,

For the boy worried what the man said

Was anything but sincere.


So he scrambles to his feet

But falls onto the floor

With gashes down his legs and hands

His faith was no more.

Thursday, February 23, 2023

Escape

With tears of anguish, but solum actions,

Searching for a soul escape.

Is this the answer, the reason why, for 

planning out a whole escape?


Could this be deeper, and lost in confusion,

Or simply the easier way?

For all the dark times, when you couldn’t hide,

But run, run, run to escape.


Is there any chance, just a glimmer of hope,

In which there is another way?

Instead of racing in circles, with eyes to the past,

And dreaming of false escape.


Why is it so difficult, an option not to be taken,

To stare down the monster?

To face your fears, and wake up satisfied,

Of a true nightmare escape.


But no there is no choice— Destiny, you can only see that it’s but a dream.

And not a reflection of truth, of your daily life,

With which there is no escape.

Wednesday, February 22, 2023

Night and Day

Once upon a time,

We lived in the dark,

Unaware of the Journey,

We would soon embark.


Our hearts lived alone,

Drowning in the fear,

That one day the end,

Would be drawing near.


Just when we lost faith,

And could no longer cope,

We found each other,

And with it a  hope.


A hope to be free,

A chance we now own,

To know we had eachother,

To know we weren’t alone.


Your hand in mine,

And our fingers laced,

Now Side by side,

The love we embraced.


I was always to find you,

And you to find me,

Our love together,

Set our hearts free.


You are the moon,

Brightening the night,

And I am the sun,

The light of your life.

Tuesday, February 21, 2023

The Housewife

I sit alone at the table

eyeing the empty seat.

“Shouldn’t he be here already?

There is nothing else to do.”

A ripple of energy runs through my thigh,

bouncing my knee in anticipation.

The steady rate of my heart vibrates

in tune with jitters flogging my mind.

What is one to do or to think

when time has not yet begun?

“No-The destination is yet to be reached,

so keep calm and keep it steady now.”

At last, with but a simple smile,

he appears and plants a kiss.

“Hey there darling” he murmurs.

“How was your day today?”

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